


Stumbling On As The Bottle Spins

by respoftw



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Drunk!Rodney, Kissing, M/M, Party Games, Ridiculousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-18
Updated: 2016-11-18
Packaged: 2018-08-31 18:27:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8589118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/respoftw/pseuds/respoftw
Summary: It's not a prayer circle, it's a kissing circle.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Heads up, this is ridiculous. It started life as part of '35 ways to say I love you in the Pegasus Galaxy' but I abandoned it 300 words in as too far-fetched. Seriously, why would they be playing spin the bottle?!
> 
> I picked it up again tonight because sometimes we need a bit of ridiculousness in our life. Especially now.
> 
> Enjoy.

Rodney wasn't sure why he was attending Laura Cadman's birthday party but he thought it might have something to do with the look that she'd given him when she had tracked him down in the mess hall to invite him. The one that said " _I know all your secrets and you better do whatever the hell I ask unless you want everyone to know about the gay porn on your hard drive."_

He doesn't think she'd actually do it (he's like 90% sure) but he learned a long time ago not to piss off the women - or men - who'd see him naked. Military bases were small places and all it took was one gesture with a pinkie finger to start a rumour that meant he'd not had sex in the better part of a year - he'd never understood the urge to send dick pics until that precise moment in time.

Whatever the reason, Rodney was in attendance, forced to make small talk with people whose names he hadn't ever bothered to learn and listen to what passed for music in Cadman's very _wrong_ opinion.

Thank God for alcohol. He still believed that the home brew was only good thing to come from the botany department - a fact that he felt the need to insistently slur at everyone he spoke to as the night went on.

Alcohol was great. In fact, parties were great. Laura Cadman was great, but not as great as John. John was the greatest. Hey, where was John?

Rodney spotted John's messy hair in the circle of people getting ready to sit on the floor. He staggered over with half a mind to save John from whatever Athosian kumbayah session was about to start up.

Cadman grinned up at him when he reached the circle. "Didn't have you down for this, Rodney. Gotta say, I'm impressed."

Impressed? Rodney liked to impress people. He pulled himself up tall, tilting his chin high in the air. "I am a very open minded man," he announced to the amused crowd. "I am down for many things."

Cadman guffawed. She reached up and pulled him down by his arm until he was kneeling in the space beside her. "Time to put your money where your mouth is, McKay" she cackled.

"I don't have any money," he worried. "Oh, wait," he rummaged around in his pockets, "I think I have some of those coins that they used on PX-whatever the hell. I can get those?"

"Wow," Cadman chuckled. "You get stupid when you're drunk, huh?" She patted his arm soothingly. "It's fine, McKay, let's just play the game."

Game? Rodney liked games. He had been a champion mathlete at college, in fact he might still hold the record score for the North American collegiate math tournament. He wasn't sure, he hadn't had a chance to Google himself lately but - - a cup of home brew was pressed into his hand and Rodney shut up, forgetting about the math competitions.

Cadman exercised her right as the party girl to start the game and since it didn't look like he was needed for anything right now, Rodney let his mind and his eyes wander happily until they struck upon John. Rodney sat up straighter, remembering why he came over to the circle in the first place. He was supposed to be saving John from swallowing the blue pill and believing the lies that the prayer circle were going to feed him.

John caught his eye and raised his eyebrow in query. John's eyebrows were so expressive, Rodney was incredibly impressed that he had managed to so clearly communicate his concern for Rodney's involvement in the prayer circle with just a twitch of muscle. He attempted to communicate his plan to rescue John through a similar series of movements but the crease between John's eyes just got more pronounced.

Cadman moved next to him and distracted Rodney's attention. He only just managed save his precious alcohol from being spilled over the warm floor as Cadman shifted on to her knees and crawled coquettishly over towards Mike Branton. Rodney's mouth dropped open as they exchanged a kiss.

This wasn't a prayer circle! It was a..a _kissing_ circle!

Rodney grinned widely. John was safe after all. He smiled beatifically at John as Mike Branton took his turn spinning the bottle. Rodney wasn't sure where the bottle had came from, hadn't noticed it before but everything was slotting into place now and the alcohol buzzed pleasantly under his skin as he watched Branton and Esposito exchange a heated kiss.  They looked good together.  He told them loudly that they'd make beautiful babies.

Esposito ended up kissing Kusanagi who then went on to kiss some nameless jarhead that Rodney didn't know. The nameless jarhead spun the bottle with such force that it skittered across the circle, almost knocking over Rodney's cup. That was the second time he'd almost lost his drink. Deciding that it wasn't safe to leave the cup on the floor, Rodney downed what was left in one gulp and sat back on his heels, pleased at his lateral thinking.

A laugh broke out across the group and Rodney realised he'd missed something. The grunt was flushed a deep red and shaking his head in refusal. Rodney followed the neck of the bottle to see it pointed straight towards him. His eyes rolled in disgust. "Oh, please," he complained. "DADT doesn't exist anymore and you were perfectly happy to watch Rafaela and Miko. Men like you give the rest of us a bad name." Rodney dismissed the marine with a wave of his hand and grabbed at the bottle. "You don't even deserve to be kissed by me," Rodney shouted towards the leaving man's back. "I am a handsome man."

"You tell him Rodney," Cadman whooped in delight.

Rodney was so busy pointing fondly at Cadman that he didn't notice that the bottle had stopped until he saw Cadman's eyes widen in a sort of panicked glee. He followed the direction of her gaze and settled on...John.

"Perfect!" Rodney almost fell on his face in his hurry to crawl over to John. He arrived in front of a terrified looking John without falling over and patted him reassuringly on the face. "I'm gonna rock your world, Colonel," he promised seriously.

John opened his mouth and Rodney took advantage of the opening, leaning in close and placing his mouth on John's own. Rodney hummed happily as he tasted alcohol on John's tongue, licking his way into John's mouth. He was dimly aware of hooting and hollering around him but his focus was narrowed to the hesitant touch of John's fingers on his back, the warm heat of John's skin and the way that John relaxed inch by inch into the kiss.

Rodney broke the kiss when the need to breathe grew desperate. He smiled dazzlingly at a stunned looking John and then promptly threw up in his own lap.

That....sounded about right.

* * *

Rodney groaned as consciousness returned to him the next morning. What the hell had he been drinking last night? He was going to kill Cadman for making him feel this ill. The botany department were in his bad books as well; their lab time was going to be seriously reduced until they managed to brew alcohol that didn't leave him feeling like a wrung out dishrag the next day.

"Feeling sorry for yourself?"

Rodney startled at the Colonel's voice. He twisted around, his head screaming a protest at him the entire time, to see John sitting on his couch with a cup of coffee - Rodney's favourite "Astrophysicist of the Century" cup - on the table next to him.

"What are you doing here?" Rodney asked. Or, at least, that's what he meant to ask. What actually came out of his mouth was "I kissed you."

John's expressive eyebrows struck again, this time looking more amused than concerned. "You remember that, huh? I wasn't sure you would." John sipped his coffee. "Do you remember what happened next?"

Rodney dropped his face back into his pillow. God, he wished he didn't remember what had happened after that. "Kill me now," he moaned.

He heard John chuckle and felt the mattress move as someone settled next to him. "That might interfere with my plans."

Rodney risked a peek from his pillow and found John sitting next to him, looking fondly down at him.

"Plans?" Rodney chanced.

"Hmm," John hummed in agreement. "Plans to find out whether you're any better at the whole kissing thing when you're sober."

Rodney bristled in outrage, his headache forgotten in the immediate need to redeem his good name. "Better?! I'll have you know that I am excellent kisser. My mouth and these lips have brought better men than you to their knees, Colonel."

John leaned closer. "Oh, yeah? Prove it."

Rodney did.

Maybe Cadman wasn't so bad after all.

 

**Author's Note:**

> As always, you can find me on [Tumblr](http://buffycuddlespigs.tumblr.com)


End file.
